pnosa

mostly a true story

            COLD OPEN

EXT. DOWNTOWN SAN FRANCISCO / STREET CORNER - DAY

HERZOG (15), the wirehaired dachshund, and PNOSA (30’s),
playing ukulele, stroll market street
amid the bustle of daily traffic.

herzog’s legs stiffen.
dry heaving coughs precipitate white vomit.
pnosa rushes to him and wipes his whiskers.

        PNOSA
    oh no… herzog!

herzog shakes off the funk and keeps moving.

at an intersection, they wait for the pedestrian signal.

a girl (20’s) reaches for herzog -
his tail wags as fast as pnosa’s heart.

        GIRL
    your dog’s so cute. he doesn’t need a leash?
    
        PNOSA
    you should really ask before you —

nearby well-dressed WILSON GOLDSACHS (50’s) charges
forward, waves a cigarette, and shouts into a phone.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    NO. what you sent is the WORST FUCKING ARTWORK
    I’VE EVER SEEN.

in an instant, wilson goldsachs glances at the phone
and heedlessly steps into the street —
certain death by an oncoming autonomous vehicle.

        PNOSA
    MISTER!

the vehicle flashes its headlights,
revs the motor, and accelerates.

        AUTONOMOUS VEHICLE
    human impact imminent.

pnosa pulls wilson goldsachs to the sidewalk.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    WHAAAA! UGH!

wilson goldsachs drops the phone and cigarette.

        PNOSA
    that bot wanted you dead!

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    FUCKING WOKE TOASTER!

wilson goldsachs picks up the phone and rubs his forehead.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i love the patch-pants.

        PNOSA
    ummm, you’re welcome?

pnosa turns around: the girl is gone.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    do you make them yourself?

        PNOSA
    i did, i do, i’m an artist.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i need an artist.

        PNOSA
    actually i’m a sewing artist - actually.
    i draw with a sewing machine.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i’ve never heard of anyone doing this.

        PNOSA
    there’s not a lot of us.
    i’ll be sewing in the mission this weekend -
    hopefully.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    hope is for the weak.
                (begins texting)

        PNOSA
    well, i’m traveling. and if there’s one thing
    i’ve learned about HOPING to find parking,
    you have to be willing to wait.

SFX: sent text notification

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    do you have a card?

pnosa scours his pockets,
and produces a card technically still legible.

        PNOSA
    i’m pnosa - i make collaborative patches
    with a solar powered —

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    save the elevator pitch.

wilson goldsachs opens a gold case,
and gives pnosa a metal business card.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    wilson goldsachs - with winsten cigarettes.

the card’s surface catches the sun in pnosa’s eyes.

        PNOSA
    wilson with winsten. OH, you’re the CEO.

EXT. DOWNTOWN SAN FRANCISCO / SIDEWALK - DAY

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    walk with me.

        PNOSA
    uh, where?

wilson goldsachs points up, crosses the street,
expecting pnosa to follow.

pnosa purses his lips, checks on herzog,
and trails wilson goldsachs.

        PNOSA
    i would think you’d have a limo.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    driving in the city is unacceptable.

wilson goldsachs lights a cigarette.
pnosa dodges the smoke.

        PNOSA
    yeah, the fumes are just as bad.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i want you to sew something for me.

        PNOSA
    should i use reflective thread?

INT. SALESFORCE TOWER / FRONT DESK SECURITY - DAY

wilson goldsachs, pnosa, and herzog enter the high-rise.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    mmmmm… make it black and white - no color.
    whatever comes to mind when i say, “wince free”.

        PNOSA
    like, living without consequence?

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    you tell me, you’re the artist.

the front desk security guard nods as they pass.

        PNOSA
    i know exactly what i’d sew.

wilson goldsachs waves his phone over a sensor.

SFX: chime

the elevator opens instantly.

INT. SALESFORCE TOWER / ELEVATOR - DAY

herzog’s body wobbles as they ascend.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i’ll pay you a thousand dollars, now.

        PNOSA
    whoa! how big do you want this to be?

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i’m more interested in the design.
    think marketing. bold. iconic.
    about the size of a pack of cigarettes.

        PNOSA
    when do you need it?

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    you have my number. message me when you’re done,
    and where you’ll be this saturday.

        PNOSA
    sure, but like i said… with parking —
    it depends if the city’s feeling generous.

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    i’ll give you five thousand more reasons
    if you can make it happen.

EXT. SALESFORCE TOWER / HELIPAD - DAY

wilson goldsachs raises his voice
above a thumping helicopter.

in the background is a billboard advertisement
for possibly meat.
the ad shows a woman eating a sandwich and reads:

if it’s not meat, it’s possibly meat

        WILSON GOLDSACHS
    don’t disappoint me.

he opens a wallet,
and gives pnosa ten crisp one hundred dollar bills.

a helicopter butler holds the cabin door
for wilson goldsachs, and signals the pilot he is ready.

pnosa stares at the chopper - jaw dropped.
gusts of wind fluster his cheeks,
swirling his and herzog’s hair.

in the goggling, his grip loosens,
and hundred dollar bills blow into the air.

pnosa scrambles, snatching for bills.
he catches a handful, but the rest slip away.